Two of Four
Have you been doing your homework? Keeping up with those positive affirmations? I hope so…now, don’t feel that you have to say them aloud to yourself while gazing in the mirror…or even stand on one foot with your arms outstretched. Positive affirmations are just little reminders about how wonderful and loved you are! So, if you’re sitting at a red light, or taking your vitamin, or pulling the covers up at night and the thought strikes you to say “I am free..I’m worthy…I deserve to be loved” (or something similar) do it!
Today I’d like to address the Frightened Self. Even when I say the word “frightened” I crinkle my nose trying to remember the last time I experienced this emotion. Think, instead, of having a Fearful Self.
When discussing the Fearful Self I should also address feelings of unconditional love and your heart chakra…this is where unconditional love is centered. Many people’s idea of love really comes from the spleen chakra (the emotional one or desire body) …the thought being “If you’re nice to me, then you must love me. If you don’t do what I want, then you don’t care about me.” By now you should be able to recognize that as a faulty thought pattern. “If I want this other person, but am rejected…then I can’t believe in love anymore, so I will put a wall around myself.” This kind of statement is coming from the spleen chakra, not the heart chakra.
So, how do you feel about yourself? Are you encouraged about yourself? Do you like who you are? Think about some ways you can start feeling better about yourself.
The Frightened Self is located principally in the spleen chakra, but also influences the solar plexus and heart chakras. The Frightened Self is helpless, full of doubt, anxiety and tension. It is caged and not free to express itself or be true to itself. This self is fragile. Have you ever said, “I can’t do that…I was going to tell you, but I was afraid of how you would take it…I’m afraid I’m going to screw this up”? You get the idea…fear can paralyze us in subtle ways.
Similar to working with the Unworthy Self...I’d like you to personify this Fearful or Frightened Self. What does s/he look like, sound like, think? Feel free to jot down some notes as you imagine this aspect of yourself. Thinking about this part of you…when was the last time you felt fearful? What thoughts were running through your mind?
For example:
Fearful Self….looks like me, but smaller. Disheveled…a little apprehensive. Thinks she’s going to be in trouble at work.
Experienced: Last week
Thought: “Ugh,I didn’t finish this task on time…my boss is going to be pissed. I don’t want to tell her.”
Try recognizing the faulty thoughts and rephrasing them to reflect more of an accurate assessment: “I didn’t finish the task on time. I’m frustrated that I didn’t meet my deadline. I will talk to my boss about it. There’s a chance she will be upset with the results.”
Chances are if you could pick out one event involving the Fearful Self…there might be more. Instead of trying to run through a life-time slide show of these events…try and identify how this frightened aspect of self is negatively impacting your life.
Tapping into that unconditional love center…let your love for the Fearful Self flow out to that aspect of you…feel the love…bask in knowing that no matter what you have harmony around you…you create your own harmony…you are free to express yourself without being fearful…you are free…you are loved.
How does that Self look now? A lot like you? Feel that part of you…in your heart, spleen and solar plexus…. and know that you are whole. You have purpose.
Go ahead and make a list of things that will help you feel better about yourself; put it where you can easily see it. And this week try to complete some items off that list.
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