...but I can't!

Mind over Matter: The Power of Positive Thinking
Three of Four 


    Continuing with my four part series on Mind over Matter,  today I'd like to address that part of you that may emerge from time to time known as the Helpless Self  (HS). 
     I see the helpless self as a coin: on one side you find the helpless self and on the other side resides the Controlling Self (CS). Often when we feel helpless we try to control something or someone so that we no longer feel helpless. 


     A mature and enlightened HS allows us to feel the power of our love. With this empowerment we no longer feel the need to control everything. We allow others to be free...to be free to make mistakes...to be free to be unaware...because we know that they are responsible for themselves and we are responsible of ourselves.


     The CS is a guard that can't be free...it feels the need to control everything. The HS is a creature who feels no power, love, or self-esteem. As long as you insist on controlling you will feel helpless. 


     Do you ever feel powerless? Have you ever thought "I'd like to do that but 'they' won't let me," "My boss won't let me do that," "My spouse will get angry if I do that," or "If you love me, you'll do as I say." The HS is limited, without options, trapped in either helplessness or in controlling others.


    Linking this HS to your physical and energetic bodies: the HS is located primarily in the Solar Plexus Chakra but has a strong influence on all the other chakras, too. When the HS feels powerless and/or controlled it compensates by overpowering and  manipulating. 


    Faulty thoughts of the HS and CS:-
     1. I can't do it by myself
     2. I can't make it happen
     3. I need someone to take care of me
     4. If you don't do what I want to do then I'll nag you until you do
     5. I feel that my life is out of control
     6. I don't have a chance of success
     7. I must have eight hours of sleep or I'm a wreck


   I'm sure you can come up with a few more thoughts of the HS. Something to think about....what are some ways you control others...yourself....or situations? What would happen if you gave up control?


   It really helps to visualize and give voice to your thoughts surrounding this issue. Identifying and owning your HS and CS will assist you in transforming this aspect of yourself. Of course, this has to be an area of your life that you'd really like to work with and change.


   I'd like you to hang out with your HS/CS. Focus on your solar plexus (placing a hand there if you feel lead). What is it saying to you? What's the first thought that comes to mind? Would you identify this thought as controlling or helpless? 


    Take a few moments to write these discoveries down. 
    
    Now I'd like you to look at how your helpless and/or controlling thoughts have kept you from getting what you want/need in life. How has the expression of these faulty thoughts left a negative imprint? 


     If you aren't where you want to be and recognize yourself saying or thinking thoughts of the HS or CS....perhaps it's time to heal that aspect of yourself so that you can move forward and get what you really want out of life. 


    Why not engage in some self-talk? Sit down and have a chat with your helpless self or controlling self. Pay attention to specific incidents, thoughts and words that have helped keep that helpless and/or controlling self powerful. 


     What would you like to experience instead? How would you like to react to situations? What kind of life do you see yourself living...does it have an aspect of helplessness, does it have control issues, or do you pfrefer to see yourslef as confident, secure, and able to express your loving self?


   It's your choice. No judgment. You might like what you're experiencing and that's okay. 


    If you are ready to let that part of yourself go...let it go. Let it walk out the door, into the light, or watch it transform and become a part of your loving self - who you truly are. 


    Remember, you always have a choice. You have the freedom and the ability.