Basic Relationship Advice

Basic Relationship Advice

Pick up any glossy magazine or browse  Google for an article on love and relationships and you’re bound to find a bevy of how-tos and what-to-dos. If you are currently in a relationship or are actively seeking one – here are some basic things to think about:

1. Understand the role of romantic relationships.

We are attracted to the opposite sex for varying reasons. Sometimes it’s the sound of his laughter, the soft beard that covers his dimples, his honesty, or the way he twirls you around the dance floor.

We may feel comfort, sexual attraction, and/or affection. However, the larger role of romantic relationships is to help us to grow into the best version of ourselves.

How do you feel about yourself when you are together?

Your relationship satisfaction and fulfillment is based on your authenticity, boundaries, and ability to recognize the amount of learning and personal growth you receive from the relationship.

2. There is no perfect person.

Wait! What?

Sorry to burst your glitter-filled bubble, but there is not perfect mate…only the perfect mate for you.

Build your relationship foundation on shared core qualities (trustworthiness, respect, unconditional love, passion, etc.) and work together to create your ideal relationship. Expect learning curves, growth and lots of learning.

3. Shelve the idea of Happily Ever After.

Thanks Hans Christian Andersen for the fairytale ending of finding the one perfect person to spend the rest of our lives with…a subconscious thought form imbedded at an early age.

Some relationships are meant for a lesson, a brief interlude, a decade of connection and some for a lifetime. Watch out for the trap of finding your ever-after-partner.

Appreciate what every relationship has to offer and fully commit to that person. Just be cautious when your mind leads you to the fairy tale castle of happy endings.

We can appreciate what the relationship has to offer us. We can even be committed to that person. The quality of an authentic romantic relationship does not need to be diminished because there is no projected future. Take your time and honor what the present moment has to offer you. However, be cautious when your mind starts selling you on the dream of a future and you begin to sell your partner on that idea.

L

Be the Happiest version of you!

Have Fun! 10 Ways To Be The Happiest Version Of You

By Alison Ottaway

Life is better when you enjoy it. It’s simple: If you enjoy life, you feel good. And feeling good rocks!

It’s easy to forget this though - in the midst of the 9 to 5, when things aren’t going exactly how you want them to, during a difficult time, or when you're so busy it feels like you don’t even have the time to blink.

Here are 10 ways to enjoy your life more: 

1. Get out in nature! 

There is nothing better to heighten your enjoyment sensors than a dose of Mother Nature. Whatever the weather, getting outside, seeing natural light, catching some vitamin D, breathing fresh air, communing with the day and your environment will help bring you perspective and connection,  as well as blowing the cobwebs away.

2. Figure out what activities you love to do and do them! 

Get connected with the things that bring you joy. When does time fly? When do you feel most like yourself? On your bike, singing, in the kitchen, swimming, painting? Make a list of the things you LOVE to do and bring them into your life regularly.

3. Focus on what's happening right now. 

Whatever is happening in your life, you always have the opportunity to connect with where you are right now, to become still, quiet and focused for a moment. The more you do this, the more grounded you’ll feel, and the more you’ll allow space in your life for enjoyment to seep in when you least expect it!

4. Find a creative outlet. 

Everyone can find enjoyment, connection and satisfaction through being creative. If you’ve got something you love doing, schedule in a weekly session for it. If you’d like to explore something new, book a course or get a library book out and give it a go. 

5. Connect with friends. 

Feeling connected multiplies enjoyment, so reach out and share. When you feel the urge to talk to someone, pick up the phone. Schedule dates with friends. Go find people who are into the same things you are. If you love animals, find time to spend with them, walking next door’s dog or helping out at a cat sanctuary. Also, don’t forget your connection with your greater self, your spirituality – a short, daily meditation can open the door to much more light and enjoyment into your life.

6. Give thanks. 

Where you put your focus grows. If you focus on what is great in your life, what you love, and what you are most grateful for, your perspective will shift. Do it regularly and you’ll find yourself enjoying what you do have more.

7. Set aside some me time. 

You need time just for you. Even if you are really busy, squeezing in 15 minutes of alone time a day will make a huge difference to not only how you show up in the world, but also how you feel. Find a moment for your favourite CD, some shut-eye, that big book of sudokus or simply a cup of tea and some quiet.

8. Honor your basic needs for food, shelter, food, sleep, and love. 

Think about what’s essential for you to be content. Do you need to be warm? Do you need to see someone every day? Do you need to eat regularly? Do you need 8 hours sleep? Identify and value these things that you know keep you able to enjoy life, and organize your schedule with them in mind.

9. Single-task. 

Life is deeper, more rewarding and more enjoyable when you single task - as you connect with the task at hand and come into the present. Multi-tasking spreads you, and your potential enjoyment of life, thin. Give yourself the opportunity to enjoy what you are doing in every moment by single-tasking wherever possible.

10. Treat yourself. 

A self-administered foot massage, a walk with no destination, a facial, half an hour doing nothing, that pair of earrings you’ve been coveting, a long, aromatherapy-infused hot bath. Do it! You deserve to feel good.